HTPC offers its annotated filmography once again, summarizing some of the amazingly informative and entertaining films the HOCKEYTIME™ Movie Night (HTMN) Curators have screened over the past few years. If you want to skip the hard work of reading the actual books, just rent these movies and you're sure to ace the final exam:
Way of the Puck (tagline: A documentary film about professional air hockey. Really.)
Plot summary: What’s it like to be a champion of a sport hardly anyone has heard of? “Way of the Puck,” a documentary by Tacoma-born filmmaker Eric D. Anderson, follows four air hockey players as they battle each other for world supremacy -- and battle the world to save their beloved sport from extinction.
viewer reactions:
"Aristotle, Plato, Bodhisattva...a true religious experience!"
"puck-thetic..."
"World supremacy?"
Way of the Puck (tagline: A documentary film about professional air hockey. Really.)
Plot summary: What’s it like to be a champion of a sport hardly anyone has heard of? “Way of the Puck,” a documentary by Tacoma-born filmmaker Eric D. Anderson, follows four air hockey players as they battle each other for world supremacy -- and battle the world to save their beloved sport from extinction.
viewer reactions:
"Aristotle, Plato, Bodhisattva...a true religious experience!"
"puck-thetic..."
"World supremacy?"
viewer reactions:
"An adrenaline-drenched blast of quack-tacular fun! Every moment is magic!"
"quack. Quack. QUack. QUAck. QUACk. QUACK. QUACKQUACKQUACKQUACKQUACK!!!!!"
"No, I'm NOT crying! I just...have something in my eye...."
"quack. Quack. QUack. QUAck. QUACk. QUACK. QUACKQUACKQUACKQUACKQUACK!!!!!"
"No, I'm NOT crying! I just...have something in my eye...."
D2: Mighty Ducks (tagline: The Puck Stops Here)
viewer reactions:
"Listen to how they snore...Just like Chris E!"
"It's knucklepuck time!"
"Hey Goldberg! I bet if that puck was a cheeseburger you'd stop it!!"
"I don't want to spend the rest of my life watching hockey movies in this rinkydink town..."
"It's knucklepuck time!"
"Hey Goldberg! I bet if that puck was a cheeseburger you'd stop it!!"
"I don't want to spend the rest of my life watching hockey movies in this rinkydink town..."
Miracle (tagline: What America needed was a miracle. What it got was a hockey game)
viewer reactions:
"So good that I wanted to watch the movie again. [Whistle.] And again. [Whistle.] And again. [Whistle.] And again...."
"I'm Mitch P, from Ann Arbor, Michigan, and I play for the United States of America!"
"I had no idea that hockey players were such wholesome young men...."
"So good that I wanted to watch the movie again. [Whistle.] And again. [Whistle.] And again. [Whistle.] And again...."
"I'm Mitch P, from Ann Arbor, Michigan, and I play for the United States of America!"
"I had no idea that hockey players were such wholesome young men...."
HTPC says: Even though it's been 27 years since the US Olympic Hockey team delivered the Miracle that America was in such desperate need of, seeing Kurt Russell and the rest of the cast re-create every. single. minute. of the entire. seven. months. of training. and. preparation that led to the gold medal brought it back to us as if it were just yesterday...We were nearly all in tears.
Mystery, Alaska (tagline: A Small Town on the Outskirts of Greatness)
viewer reactions:
"I went in thinking I was just going to get Burt Reynolds, and got a surprise bonus of Burt Reynolds mindmelding with Sean Connery & Sherlock Holmes! OSCAR! OSCAR!!"
"An eloquent look at the effervescent language of a small town Saturday hockey-league club room."
"Educational?! Bring the kids to this movie series and they'll be able to cuss like a fisherman, #$%! like a *&@@#, and share all sorts of new things with their classmates (phrases like 'what the puck?' and the real reason not to high stick a guy you like...) - I don't think this stuff will turn up on the WASL."
"An eloquent look at the effervescent language of a small town Saturday hockey-league club room."
"Educational?! Bring the kids to this movie series and they'll be able to cuss like a fisherman, #$%! like a *&@@#, and share all sorts of new things with their classmates (phrases like 'what the puck?' and the real reason not to high stick a guy you like...) - I don't think this stuff will turn up on the WASL."
Slapshot (tagline: SlapShot outslaps... outswears... outlaughs...)
viewer reactions:
"&#($!*F&%#^&#!!"
"why, you oughta !@#*&%#!$#"
"Paul Newman is dreamy..."
"Emma - earmuffs!"
Sudden Death (tagline: They said Game 7 would be a war. They didn't know the 1/2 of it)
viewer reactions:
"All I know is if we don't get this global warming fixed, we're gonna feel the effects like a stick upside the head'll knock your front teeth out. These penguins are mad they're comin' after US! Beaks bared, spatulas and steak knives at the ready. 'Sudden Death' is the most eye-opening, dammedest movie I ever saw"
"Buy Sam a drink, and get his dog one too..."
"OH MY GOD, he shot grandma!"
"PLEASE tell me there's a Sudden Death 2!!!"
"Buy Sam a drink, and get his dog one too..."
"OH MY GOD, he shot grandma!"
"PLEASE tell me there's a Sudden Death 2!!!"
Tooth Fairy (tagline: you can't handle the Tooth)
HTPC can do no better than The Stranger Slog's review of this one - we have nothing to add (other than to confirm that it does have a hockey theme):
Quick and skinny: Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson commits fantasy murder by trying to tell a little girl that there is no tooth fairy, so the magical courts make him do two weeks of tooth fairy duty. If you like tooth wordplay, then boy is this the movie for you. They don't even have to make sense. (“I pledge allegiance to the tooth”) And shouldn't Johnson be acting? Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson played Derek “Tooth Fairy” Thompson. Wow, dunno if I'll be able to suspend my belief for that one...
Youngblood (tagline: After selection for the Canadian Hamilton Mustangs, Dean Youngblood's future looks bright - even his landlady is hot.)
viewer reactions:
"Thank God there is a sport for middle-sized white boys!"
"He's so pretty!"
"Heaver' was truly a breakout role for Keanu - this work clearly prepared him for inevitable stardom in such classics as Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure and Point Break".
"He's so pretty!"
"Heaver' was truly a breakout role for Keanu - this work clearly prepared him for inevitable stardom in such classics as Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure and Point Break".
Goon (tagline: Meet Doug, The Nicest Guy You'll Ever Fight) This one is not for the faint of heart - teeth go flying, blood is spilled. But there's a heartwarming love story threaded between the fights...
Additional gems:
Happy Gilmore (tagline: He doesn't play golf... he destroys it)
MVP (tagline: Jack skates a little faster... Shoots a little harder... And is driving everyone bananas.)
The Rocket (tagline: the Gladiator of hockey movies)
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